Saturday, October 13, 2012

Crap shoot.

Hi All!  Blogging from the air! Hmm let’s see.  I’m traveling back from some business in Barcelona, and according to this monitor, I’m 3044 miles from home and 36,000 feet in the air.  Minus kids, plus internet access.  Yes, I think the planets have aligned on their bi-yearly pattern allowing me the ability to post to this sadly forgotten blog!  Wherein I will take the opportunity to elaborate on something that no one had ever told me.  It’s the gambling quality of business travel as a mom.  My truth is this: BUSINESS TRAVEL AS A MOTHER = RUSSIAN ROULETTE.

And because of my profession, I keep finding myself pointing the gun at my head.  Here are the ways things have shaken out when I have to pull the trigger.

TYPE 1: GET OUT OF JAIL FREE CARD (AKA, dodging the bullet!)

Trip is short, kids are in good spirits, husband is super-dad, and I’m gone and back before we know it.  Lots of wincing as trigger is pulled, but outcome is fine and my brain is still intact.  Mama lives to see another day.

TYPE 2: DO NOT PASS GO. DO NOT COLLECT $200. (AKA, lights out my friends.)

Trip coincides with unpredictable elements like kids being sick with fevers, unreliable nanny, etc, etc.  Kids ruin you by Skyping heart-wrenching things through feverish crocodile-tears and cartoonish frowns, such as, “I REALLY REALLY MISS YOU AND CAN’T BE HAPPY IF I CAN’T SNUGGLE WITH YOU RIGHT NOW”.  Work stress is compounded by kid sadness and frayed husband trying to manage it all.  Bullet in brain.  Bullet in heart.

BANG BANG.

TYPE 3: MISUNDERSTANDING AND MAYBE A LITTLE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF A TODDLER’S CONCEPT OF TIME  (AKA, Squirt guuun!)

Like that time I went to Chicago and nervously explaineditreallyfast, and four days later when I came home, Lucy asked me “so how was that trip to Costco?”  ... UM, IT WAS REAL GOOD! DANG IT, I FORGOT THAT 1,114 PACK OF TOILET PAPER! LET’S HUG!

And finally, thanks be to God, the status of my current trip, the very most successful of outcomes:

TYPE 4: CELEBRITY DISTRACTION (AKA, this isn’t a gun!  IT’S THE RETURN OF A LITTLE BIT OF YOUR SOUL.)

Parachute in one of the kids’ favorite people on planet earth for duration of trip.  Must be of top caliber, such as grandparent or real live Disney character.  Success rate: 100%. Kids could not care less about my whereabouts, and I can drink some cava and actually enjoy the trip.  THAT MEANS AIRPORT TCHOTCKE’S FOR YOU, CELEBRITY VISITOR!  CLEAR A SPACE ON THAT FRIDGE FOR A SPANKIN’ NEW MAGNET!

If you see my father-in-law, please everyone buy him a drink.  The evaporation of mom-guilt is a rare and magical thing, which allowed me to not only WORK but ENJOY my first trip to Barcelona. The business side was a successful whirlwind of a few days, and I had the chance to take a self-guided Barcelona-in-a-few-hours sightseeing excursion, which was awesome.  I ate local foods, saw Gaudi architecture, the Gothic quarter, the Cathedral, and stood in the Mediterranean Sea.  All while drinking cava and missing my beautiful family at home.  And more than ever, I can’t wait to get home and hug them all to pieces.

I don’t know if it will get easier or harder as they get older.  But I’m taking this (wine-induced, happy post-successful-trip) moment to appreciate how lucky I am to have my lovely family, and also enjoy my job.  Balance is impossibly hard to achieve, but this past week felt like a step in the right direction. 

Is it obvious I got a little tipsy while writing this? (PS, I also just watched What to Expect While You’re Expecting on the plane and balled my eyes out.)

HEY FAMILY!  SEE YOU IN A FEW HOURS, LOVES! 

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Working on the weekend

I don't know about you, but I don't mind a weekend business meeting with the likes of these two.


Especially because the tiny executive on the right wears no pants.

I'm at the airport now jetting off to Dallas for a tradeshow.  Loving being back in the work saddle again, but I will miss those kiddos like crazy over the next few days.  (That said, I'm pretty sure Return of the Mack started blaring in the background when I hopped a taxi to the airport...)

Wish us all luck!

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Happy birthday, Nat!

New fun challenge this year!  Get TWO squirmy babes (one wanting to hold the sign, one wanting to eat it) to pose and hold the annual "happy birthday" sign for their dear ol' Da.  (Luckily this photo was snapped before it turned into the inevitable someone face planting on the floor while the other one yells "KING OF THE CASTLE!")

Bravo, lil ones.  Way to wish the best guy in our lives a happy one!


Adorableness (amongst 999 crazy outtakes)

Now, let's all freak out about how far we've come.  Last year. Year before. Year before that. EGADS.

Monday, July 9, 2012

Crack Attack

A trillion things are going on here.  Ten second update: traveled for work, offered a full-time job, now looking for full-time nanny, old nanny's out of the picture, Lucy turned 3, holidays, and, oh about a billion things with Fred. However, I had to interrupt my silence with a small update.

Fred is sitting up, and it's so darn cute.  Particularly because of the plumber situation he's got going on, if you know what I mean.  Or as Lucy says in seriousness at the sight of a bum crack, "I think your shirt is broken. I see a crack coming out."



Also, a smiliar sighting, a few years ago.

Friday, June 8, 2012

Everything she does is a critique on me...

If I wasn't already terrible at keeping up with the blog with kid + job + new kid + new job... Now I'm working on a monster of a conference which I fly out for TOMORROW, so I'm even more off the map!

I am trying to juggle working from home with a part-time babysitter, but given the proximity of my event, I've  been working many many hours outside of when the babysitter is here.

This week, I heard Lucy playing with her pink plastic toy laptop, saying to the babysitter, "I HAVE TO WORK OK?  CAN YOU PLEASE BE QUIET? I'LL GIVE YOU A COOKIE IF YOU CAN BE QUIET WHILE I WORK." 

Babysitter laughed; I kinda cried.

AND THE CAT'S IN THE  CRADLE AND THE SILVER SPOON...

Thursday, May 3, 2012

WE DID IT!

Guys!  We moved!  Last Friday we closed on the new house (finally!) and Saturday, we moved ourselves in.  And not a moment too soon... 

Because OY.  A month of solitude on the Cape.  Yes, the Cape is lovely - but let's just go ahead and say that I'm happy to be on the mainland.  I NEED PEOPLE.  Had some flash backs of this time in my life when I realized I had learned (created?) personalities for all of the geese. Well, really just Gimpy and his girlfriend. (I don't know the other geese!)  And then there was that fox that came by every evening, Swiper (Lucy named him, obvi).  He was nice.  And those two feral cats - the big orange one (Rodney Dangerfield) and the snarky black & white one (Billy Crystal).

Someone please call me on my phone.

So yes, I expect to have some more conversations with people to draw me back into a normal mental state.  But ironically, I'm writing this from the Cape, again, because we're having a little work done on the house, so I came back today/tomorrow with the kiddos.  And, you know, we didn't want to miss a Thursday night with Rodney & Bill...


Sunday, April 22, 2012

What a difference a day or two makes.

Okey dokes. Seems like I'm making good on my promise to not let this blog die a slow and silent death.  After all, I've missed you.

So yes, there was that last post.  The one where I went a little nutty and may or may not have been a little TMI. It was the fever talking. Or maybe it was my extended isolation out here on the Cape, where I literally know zero people that I didn't make or marry. (<< winner!)

However - the aforementioned 48 hours have passed and... I'm feeling good as new!

Recap anyone?

Day one. Woke up in pain. Called doc. Got meds. Fever climbing. Fever induced blog rant. Full day of delirious fever, aches, migrane. Not human. Nightfall. Fever breaks, and the ability to think and move slowly returns.

Day two. Manageable fever (aka sanity via Tylenol). Trying to make up for lost time with kids/work/home. Triple fail as I wandered in and out of fever mode with crazy aches.

Day three.  That would be today! And you can tell by my lack of pointiness and capslock that I'm thrilled to be feeling 100%. As in, not a trace of the delirium that was Thursday. As if it never happened. Happy happy happy to be done with that.

And a little off topic:

I just noticed that I need to add another octopus to my banner. We ain't just a one-octopus family anymore!  We've got this little guy, who can't get enough of that sweet little reflection above his swing...

Quite handsome Freddy, I agree.